So the other day my mother had her school play for the DPS annual day. She was playing a part on stage and was quite nervous. Anyway, there was a fight at home regarding the car. To avoid chaos I agreed to drive down mehrauli road at 6:30 am to drop her to school and get the car back.. We reached school at around 7:15 (Yeah in 45 minutes, dunno how because I was quite asleep!) . I got out of the car and helped her with the bags and everything. The school ground was filled with little kids dressed in their respective costumes and all ready to go to Kamani (the auditorium) where the play was to show. I said bye bye to mom as I sat in the car and she walked towards the school. Then suddenly I heard my mother's name being cheered and greeted. Apparently, a bunch of kids were calling out to my mother. "Poonam maam,Poonam maam" they screamed as they came and hugged her around her waist. Some of them caught hold of her legs because they weren't tall enough. More kids swarmed in like bees as if mom was covered with honey. They just wouldn't let go and she had to walk with them clinging on. They kept shrieking with laughter and yelling out her name, fought with each other for their share of her and she smiled all the way without a sign of discomfort or frustration.
She looked like the perfect teacher and I was immensely proud to be her son.
I yawned and honked at the gatekeeper to open the gate and drove back home with that image in my head wondering what I'd eat for breakfast. But that's just my life....
Saturday, February 21, 2009
नमस्ते जी
हाँ तोह भाई श्रीमान और श्रीमती,
अगर आप कभी बगीचे में गए हों तोह आपको ज़रूर एक फूल दिखा होगा। इस फूल को आप लोगों ने तोर कर सवार होगा या किसी प्रेमी उर्फ़ प्रेमिका को दे दिया होगा। क्या आप जानते हैं के "फूल" शब्द किस अक्षर से शुरू होता है?
वोह अक्षर है "फ"
Okay that was fun :) , The hindi font is really smart. Anyway so here's a fun little experiment.
Say the word "फूल" out loud. If you're saying "Fool" then you need some hindi lessons. For those who know the correct pronunciation of the first syllable, here's something to do.
Try and write फूल in english and try to spell it in a way to recreate the perfect pronunciation of "फूल"।
I was quite amazed to find out that one cannot recreate that particular syllable sound in english. There seem to be no combination of letters that produce that sound when pronounced together.
Quite random but yet amazing don't you think ?..... Oh btw, this particular discovery has been running in my head for about 3 weeks now.. Today when I actually got myself to write about it , I discovered that there is a way in which you can reproduce the sound... Try figuring out how and leave ur comments :)
अगर आप कभी बगीचे में गए हों तोह आपको ज़रूर एक फूल दिखा होगा। इस फूल को आप लोगों ने तोर कर सवार होगा या किसी प्रेमी उर्फ़ प्रेमिका को दे दिया होगा। क्या आप जानते हैं के "फूल" शब्द किस अक्षर से शुरू होता है?
वोह अक्षर है "फ"
Okay that was fun :) , The hindi font is really smart. Anyway so here's a fun little experiment.
Say the word "फूल" out loud. If you're saying "Fool" then you need some hindi lessons. For those who know the correct pronunciation of the first syllable, here's something to do.
Try and write फूल in english and try to spell it in a way to recreate the perfect pronunciation of "फूल"।
I was quite amazed to find out that one cannot recreate that particular syllable sound in english. There seem to be no combination of letters that produce that sound when pronounced together.
Quite random but yet amazing don't you think ?..... Oh btw, this particular discovery has been running in my head for about 3 weeks now.. Today when I actually got myself to write about it , I discovered that there is a way in which you can reproduce the sound... Try figuring out how and leave ur comments :)
Sunday, February 1, 2009
A few days back I found myself searching for the passport office's website on the internet. My younger brother needs his passport renewed from a 5 years minor passport to a 10 year full fledged thing and so I was assigned the task. (I being the elder responsible one :P ). Anyway, google brought me to the passport departments website and I have to say, I was IMPRESSED. Not by the idea of a website dedicated to the process of passport applications but by the simplicity with which the website offered information. Within 15 minutes I knew exactly what kind of passport my brother required, the documents needed for renewal and I downloaded the application forms too. To top it all, the website told me the timings of the passport office, the counters for different types of passport applications. Every bloody thing I could imagine was there on the site.
But you know our opinions about government procedures don't you ? I'm equipped with a Master's in Computer Applications, I've been using the internet for years but still my trust in the information presented on the website lacked confidence. I don't know why it happens, but whenever I've gone to one of these government offices, I somehow always feel as if they're out to get me. It's not just me , If you ask me they're out to get everyone.....
I had to call someone and find out if I've got everything figured out to the 'T'. So, I searced for the passport office telephone numbers. This is where things started getting interesting. I think I'm going to use a new paragraph :D
Like I said, I tried finding out the passport office numbers.
OBSERVATION : No numbers on the main website.
REASON : Unselected city in the PASSPORT office drop down list on the main page.
RESULT : Extreme frustration on discovery.
I had to kill the webpage, I just had to. I picked up the phone and dialled "9511-2222222". That's JUST DIAL's enquiry service (For those living in the stone age). I waited for someone to pick up and soon enough a friendly voice greeted me. I asked for the Delhi Passport office numbers and the information was promptly sent on my mobile. They concluded the call by asking me if I was looking for some passport agents. I said No! and hung up. I really don't care for their courtesy at the end of the call. Why would I want numbers of passport agents at the end of the call ? If I want them , I will ask for them in the beginning. It just pisses me off.
Anyway, coming back to the numbers of the passport office. I got 5 (Wooohooooo!!). "I've got them now", I thought to myself and furiously punched the first number on my landline.
What followed was something I like to call " THE Tringg Tringg, No response Phenomenon". To put it simply, NOONE BLOODY ANSWERED. I tried the other numbers, same thing, over and over again for every number I dialled. Finally, someone picked up. I was so overjoyed on hearing the euphoric "hello" , I couldn't utter anything for the first few seconds. Eventually I managed to put forth my question.
"For Tatkaal passports, what documents are supposed to be submitted?".
The ass on the other end of the line said , "Please call the enquiry counter.." and he hung up. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.. It took me 25 minutes to get through to one number and he hung up in 20 seconds. I couldn't take it so I called the same number again and again and again. I got through again, a different guy this time. I changed my question this time around and asked
Me : "Can I have the number of the enquiry counter?".
Stranger in passport office : "The enquiry counter doesn't have a phone. You'll have to come here".
............. and he hung up again.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!, I couldn't win , I just could not bloody win. It drove me insane and I decided to visit the passport office with my queries the next day. But there was one slight problem. I didn't know whether the timings for the enquiry counter were the same as that of main office. Again I called them up and found out that the enquiry counter was open till 4pm. I thanked my stars and prepared a list of questions that I had to ask.
Next day, I got off at AIIMS and for some strange reason I thought that Bhikaji Gama(Cama :S ) place was right around the corner. So I walked..... By the time I got there I had my new jacket on my arm, the top two buttons of my shirt were open and I was sweating like a pig. Apparently, Bhikaji Cama (Gama) place wasn't exactly around the corner.
I found the passport office which is at the extreme end of the complex, behind Hyatt. I took a wrong turn so I had to walk all around the complex to get there but I think there is a left from the ring road that goes right to it. I spotted the entrance and stood in line. There was huge guard blocking the gate with his arm and he wasn't looking to happy. He seemed to do the OPPOSITE of what he was SUPPOSED to do. Instead of allowing people to go in, he was stopping everyone he could. But honestly, I was impressed by the kind of protocol that the security followed. Noone was allowed in without a proper authority letter or a valid ID proof. I happened to catch the name of the company on the logo of his uniform. It said "Fireball". They were good!.. Well, my turn came and I told the guard I had to visit the enquiry counter. He gave me one of those weird stares which seemed to question my existence. I had to repeat my statement to get a response out of him.
The enquiry counter was behind the main office building. I'd just wasted 15 minutes of time standing in the wrong queue.... This was just not my day. But eventually I did get to the right queue and the right counter. Things were looking up, I was happy :) . The man on the other side of the counter asked me what I wanted to know. I handed him my brothers old passport and fired away a few questions. To each question I asked he had the same answer, "The new form is 10 Rs, take it and fill it". I tried hard to make him understand that I had already gone through the information on the website and it clearly mentioned I needed FORM # 2 for passport renewal. "The new form, Form #1 is Rs 10. The information on the website is incorrect", he said.
I thanked him for telling me the correct form number and told him that I had a printed copy of the form already. The only thing I wanted now was a list of the documents that had to be submitted with the form. But, he refused to divulge that information. I tried explaining to him that I had come all the way from Gurgaon just because they didn't have a phone at the counter but my explanation fell on deaf ears. He said that I should buy the form (that I already had printed at home) and there was a list of documents behind it. I told him to just tell them to me but he refused. His exact words were , "Aap form le lijiye, uske picche likha ha". "Toh aap nahin batayenge , agar mein form nahin lunga?", I asked. He replied "Nahin!!, aap internet se hi dekh lijiye.. Wahan likha hai sab kuch saaf saaf". He was contradicting himself and I couldn't bear to look at him anymore, so I moved out of line, cursing him as I went down the steps.
I stood in the same line 3 more times till he finally agreed to give in and told me what I needed to know. It turns out that my feeling about the information on the website was correct. One just cannot trust these government offices. I have never been able to get my work done in 1 day. It's always something or the other that I need to come back for. Incomplete documents, unmentioned attachments, always something.
But on the brighter side, at least they have a website. They even have an online registration where you can fill in the form online and then take a print. The income tax department is better in this regard. Their online system seems flawless. I applied for a PAN card online, paid a Rs 60/- fee by the credit card and the pan card was at my house within 2 weeks. It was the simplest thing I ever did. But then again, the PAN card gets moolah in for the government.
It's a shame that we don't trust our own government, but we just criticize the system don't we? Who will make a change? I develop websites for a living but would I make one for the passport department ? I don't think so, I'd rather post a new blog entry and ridicule the exisiting one...
But that's just my life!!!
But you know our opinions about government procedures don't you ? I'm equipped with a Master's in Computer Applications, I've been using the internet for years but still my trust in the information presented on the website lacked confidence. I don't know why it happens, but whenever I've gone to one of these government offices, I somehow always feel as if they're out to get me. It's not just me , If you ask me they're out to get everyone.....
I had to call someone and find out if I've got everything figured out to the 'T'. So, I searced for the passport office telephone numbers. This is where things started getting interesting. I think I'm going to use a new paragraph :D
Like I said, I tried finding out the passport office numbers.
OBSERVATION : No numbers on the main website.
REASON : Unselected city in the PASSPORT office drop down list on the main page.
RESULT : Extreme frustration on discovery.
I had to kill the webpage, I just had to. I picked up the phone and dialled "9511-2222222". That's JUST DIAL's enquiry service (For those living in the stone age). I waited for someone to pick up and soon enough a friendly voice greeted me. I asked for the Delhi Passport office numbers and the information was promptly sent on my mobile. They concluded the call by asking me if I was looking for some passport agents. I said No! and hung up. I really don't care for their courtesy at the end of the call. Why would I want numbers of passport agents at the end of the call ? If I want them , I will ask for them in the beginning. It just pisses me off.
Anyway, coming back to the numbers of the passport office. I got 5 (Wooohooooo!!). "I've got them now", I thought to myself and furiously punched the first number on my landline.
What followed was something I like to call " THE Tringg Tringg, No response Phenomenon". To put it simply, NOONE BLOODY ANSWERED. I tried the other numbers, same thing, over and over again for every number I dialled. Finally, someone picked up. I was so overjoyed on hearing the euphoric "hello" , I couldn't utter anything for the first few seconds. Eventually I managed to put forth my question.
"For Tatkaal passports, what documents are supposed to be submitted?".
The ass on the other end of the line said , "Please call the enquiry counter.." and he hung up. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.. It took me 25 minutes to get through to one number and he hung up in 20 seconds. I couldn't take it so I called the same number again and again and again. I got through again, a different guy this time. I changed my question this time around and asked
Me : "Can I have the number of the enquiry counter?".
Stranger in passport office : "The enquiry counter doesn't have a phone. You'll have to come here".
............. and he hung up again.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!, I couldn't win , I just could not bloody win. It drove me insane and I decided to visit the passport office with my queries the next day. But there was one slight problem. I didn't know whether the timings for the enquiry counter were the same as that of main office. Again I called them up and found out that the enquiry counter was open till 4pm. I thanked my stars and prepared a list of questions that I had to ask.
Next day, I got off at AIIMS and for some strange reason I thought that Bhikaji Gama(Cama :S ) place was right around the corner. So I walked..... By the time I got there I had my new jacket on my arm, the top two buttons of my shirt were open and I was sweating like a pig. Apparently, Bhikaji Cama (Gama) place wasn't exactly around the corner.
I found the passport office which is at the extreme end of the complex, behind Hyatt. I took a wrong turn so I had to walk all around the complex to get there but I think there is a left from the ring road that goes right to it. I spotted the entrance and stood in line. There was huge guard blocking the gate with his arm and he wasn't looking to happy. He seemed to do the OPPOSITE of what he was SUPPOSED to do. Instead of allowing people to go in, he was stopping everyone he could. But honestly, I was impressed by the kind of protocol that the security followed. Noone was allowed in without a proper authority letter or a valid ID proof. I happened to catch the name of the company on the logo of his uniform. It said "Fireball". They were good!.. Well, my turn came and I told the guard I had to visit the enquiry counter. He gave me one of those weird stares which seemed to question my existence. I had to repeat my statement to get a response out of him.
The enquiry counter was behind the main office building. I'd just wasted 15 minutes of time standing in the wrong queue.... This was just not my day. But eventually I did get to the right queue and the right counter. Things were looking up, I was happy :) . The man on the other side of the counter asked me what I wanted to know. I handed him my brothers old passport and fired away a few questions. To each question I asked he had the same answer, "The new form is 10 Rs, take it and fill it". I tried hard to make him understand that I had already gone through the information on the website and it clearly mentioned I needed FORM # 2 for passport renewal. "The new form, Form #1 is Rs 10. The information on the website is incorrect", he said.
I thanked him for telling me the correct form number and told him that I had a printed copy of the form already. The only thing I wanted now was a list of the documents that had to be submitted with the form. But, he refused to divulge that information. I tried explaining to him that I had come all the way from Gurgaon just because they didn't have a phone at the counter but my explanation fell on deaf ears. He said that I should buy the form (that I already had printed at home) and there was a list of documents behind it. I told him to just tell them to me but he refused. His exact words were , "Aap form le lijiye, uske picche likha ha". "Toh aap nahin batayenge , agar mein form nahin lunga?", I asked. He replied "Nahin!!, aap internet se hi dekh lijiye.. Wahan likha hai sab kuch saaf saaf". He was contradicting himself and I couldn't bear to look at him anymore, so I moved out of line, cursing him as I went down the steps.
I stood in the same line 3 more times till he finally agreed to give in and told me what I needed to know. It turns out that my feeling about the information on the website was correct. One just cannot trust these government offices. I have never been able to get my work done in 1 day. It's always something or the other that I need to come back for. Incomplete documents, unmentioned attachments, always something.
But on the brighter side, at least they have a website. They even have an online registration where you can fill in the form online and then take a print. The income tax department is better in this regard. Their online system seems flawless. I applied for a PAN card online, paid a Rs 60/- fee by the credit card and the pan card was at my house within 2 weeks. It was the simplest thing I ever did. But then again, the PAN card gets moolah in for the government.
It's a shame that we don't trust our own government, but we just criticize the system don't we? Who will make a change? I develop websites for a living but would I make one for the passport department ? I don't think so, I'd rather post a new blog entry and ridicule the exisiting one...
But that's just my life!!!
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